Big Self formed in 1979, with the original line-up consisting of Bernard Tohill on vocals and guitar, Patmo Sheeran also on guitar, Jim Nicholl on bass, and Michael Morris on drums. They were all at university/art college when they got together, and being slightly older than many of the very young punk bands on the scene, their music had a wider and different set of influences such as The Doors, Bowie, and Talking Heads. Bernard and Patmo both came from the Falls Road, while Michael and Jim came from neighbouring areas of West Belfast. When Jim left the band temporarily for personal reasons in 1980, Brendan Donnelly joined on bass and played on the band’s first release, Snakes and Ladders, which featured on the Energy Records Room To Move EP released that year. (Brendan later played in the Trial with Gordy Blair, who joined Big Self on saxaphone after notable stints as bass player first with Rudi, and then The Outcasts). Jim rejoined the band in ‘81, this time on guitar, with Patmo moving to bass. As well as playing at Northern venues such as The Harp, The Pound, Kellys of Portrush, the Devonshire Arms in Bangor and so on, Big Self played regularly in Dublin, and their early gigs at Dublin’s Magnet Bar on Pease Street (now the Widow Scallans) led to the band being invited to record a track in Dundalk for inclusion on the Nien-Teen-Eigth-Tease Boddis’ EP released in ‘81. The band’s set consisted of almost entirely original material from the beginning, with the inclusion of a couple of covers by the Doors and XTC.

BBC Radio One’s John Peel and David ‘Kid’ Jensen championed those early releases; both djs invited the band to record sessions for their shows, which Big Self travelled to London to record in the same weekend in the summer of 1980. Good Vibrations supremo Terri Hooley took an interest in the band too, and Bernard, Patmo and Michael used to help out in the Good Vibes shop. Terri presented them with a large quanity of reject reggae albums and 12’ singles, fostering their interest in reggae, an interest which inevitably found its way into the band’s music, which led to them being dubbed a ‘green reggae’ band by some. But while their music was influenced by reggae, the influence was more organic than consious, and their sound at this time was essentially characterised by strong complex rhythms and edgy guitar. And while the writing never set out to be overtly political, their songs inevitably relfected the environment they lived in, with Concrete Curtains a graphic description of the rows of bricked in windows, and Killing Brother, Weeding Out, and their first single, Surprise Surprise commenting on ‘the Troubles’ – ‘there’s government for everyone, keep it with a gun’.

Big Self’s love of reggae led to them being offered support slots on a number of tours by visiting reggae bands such as Congo Ashanti Roy and Prince Fari, tours which were arranged by Dublin based promoter Elvera Butler, who had recently set up the Reekus label for the release of a live recording of local bands at her Cork venue (including Micro Disney and Nun Attax/5 Go Down to the Sea), and Surprise Surprise became the label’s second release in September ‘81. Surprise Surprise was awarded ‘Single of the Week’ by Sounds reviewer Dave ‘Angry’ McCullough (former writer with the Alternative Ulster fanzine); McCullough, discovering Big Self for the first time, marvelled at how they ‘could flip from magnificently executed reggae on the title track to, as on the flip Take Me Away, some of the fastest most genuinely alive rock to be heard this side of J. Divison, or Hot Rods or Feelgoods for that matter.’ Dave then flew back to Belfast to ‘discover his roots through Big Self’, resulting in a full page feature in Sounds the following March. The previous October, Reekus had booked the band into Windmill Lane studios in Dublin to demo some material for a follow up single and three tracks were recorded, International Rescue, Don’t Turn Around, and Jagged Edges. As well as recording a ssession for the Dave Fanning show, Big Self also performed International Rescue on RTE televsion in early ’82; however that track never received a commercial release.
The second single, Don’t Turn Around, was produced by Windmill Lane house engineer Paul Thomas; it received the accolade ‘Single of the Year’ in Sounds on its release on March 6th 1982 by McCullough, who dubbed Big Self ‘the best thing to come out of Ireland since U2’, and thought the main location points musically were‘thrillingly between The Beat and PiL’. The band continued to gig frequently in ‘82, supporting the likes of U2 and The Beat, playing at festivals such as the Hot Press 5th Birthday Bash at Punchestown Racecourse, which featured acts such as Thin Lizzy and Rory Gallagher, and at Castlebar later that summer, where Gordy Blair (previously with with Jake Burns, Henry Cluney and Brian Falloon in Highway Star, which was to become Stiff Little Fingers when Gordy left and was replaced by Ali McMordie on bass, and subsequently with both Rudi and the Outcasts), joined Big Self on saxophone! His debut with Big Self was a baptism of fire, as he made his first public appearance with them – and also as sax player - at the Castlebar festival in the west of Ireland, playing to a huge crowd and taking the stage between Thin Lizzy and The Boomtown Rats. The band also became familiar to audiences south of the border playing regularly at Dublin’s Magnet Bar and Trinity College, and Cork’s Downtown Kampus. Big Self also supported The Beat in ’82, at Dublin’s SFX and Belfast’s Ulster Hall, and U2 took an interest in the band, inviting them to guest at shows, while Bono listed Big Self’s Don’t Turn Around among his top ten favourite records in Rolling Stone in ‘82.

In those early days, before U2’s massive international success, there was little music infrastructure in Ireland, and traditionally bands had to look to London for any chance of success. Hence record label Reekus set up a London office in the Spring of ’83, basing themselves at Brixton’s Ritzy cinema, and Big Self decided to join them some months later, a move that was only meant to be temporary. Ironically, as they moved to the UK home of reggae, the band were moving further and further away from the early reggae rhythms and increasingly developing their own unique style. The cinema, also a theatre used for live performances, provided a regular rehersal space for the band, and the very diligent Gordy could be heard each morning practising the saxophone, on which he was becoming increasingly inventive! Home was Brixton’s Coldharbour Lane, immortalised in song by Eddie Grant, and more recently the Alabama 3, where the band had a house on loan from the West Indian Domino club for their first year. Unfortunately soon after arriving in London all their gear was stolen, but with help from the record label, and a sub-publishig deal from Chappel Music, things were soon rolling again, and they made their live London debut at the Fridge in Brixton, which was run by former Roxy promoter Andrew Czechowski, in August ’83. A single, Ghostshirts, was released in both 7” and extended 12” formats, to excellent reviews and airplay both at home and in the UK. In Ireland, Dave Fanning used the track as the signature tune for his TV programme ‘Visual Eyes’, while a television recording for the BBC highlighted the flip side I’m Keen. That winter the band returned to Dublin to record their album Stateless at Windmill Lane studios, with Richard Mainwaring (OMD etc) producing. The recording was held up through Bernard injuring his arm, and then the release delayed through the distribution company going bust and the masters being held up in the ensuing contractual mess, so that Big Self’s debut album didn’t see the light of day until some 18 months later, in 1985 – however, when it did, it was to superb reviews right across the music press on both sides of the water. Meanwhile, in the summer of ’84, Owen Howell, who had previously played with bands such as Stage B, swelled the ranks of Big Self, beefing up the rhythm section on percussion, and the band continued to play around London, with regualr gigs in Dingwalls, the Marquee, The Greyhound, and Rock Garden, and periodic trips back to Ireland for TV appearances and live shows.

Big Self continued to gather many admirers in the media, in Britain, Ireland and the US, while their sound continued to become increasingly intricate, with an instinctive understanding for each other’s music; as leading Irish journalist Bill Graham, writing in Hot Press in ’85 stated “if there seems an apparent contradiction in constantly awarding muso brownie points to a band forged in the original Belfast punk furnace, it’s also unavoidable. – ‘Stateless’ has so much stubbornly crafted musical detail, from the meshing of Sheeran and Morris, the Siamese twin guitars of Tohill and Nicholl, through to the top layer of the harmonies and Gordy Blair’s brooding yet nervy saxophone – they really have created their own unmistakable highly original sound.” Amercian record producer John Ryan (Santana, REM etc.) came across the album while it was awaiting its protracted release, and was so taken with the band’s sound that he offered to do some further work on it for free – his remix of Reason Smiles was later issued as a 12” single in April ‘85 along with Secretly, which had been recorded with the album tracks in Windmill Lane, and Beyond The Pale and Calanda, both demoed in Chappel Music’s studio in 1985. A college tour of the US with REM was mooted but unfortunately failed to materialise. The band travelled to Dublin in June to perform two tracks, Ghostshirts and Weeding Out for RTE’s TV Gaga, and record a session for Dave Fanning’s radio show, as well as some gigs. Their last single Vision was released in August ’85, and while Stateless was released later that summer and received such superb reviews in all the music press – Melody Maker, NME, Sounds, Hot Press etc., Big Self were becoming increasingly frustrated with the difficulties experienced through financially constrained living in London. Michael, for family reasons, decided to return to live in Belfast, and Owen took over on drums, but the band had lost focus and began to gig less and less, and so Gordy left to join the reformed Ruefrex. When Big Self travelled to Dublin in December ’85 for a Late Late Show appearance to perform their latest single, Vision, and for a gig at the university, they did so without Gordy, and when invited to Dublin for the large outdoor Self-Aid concert in May ’86 they played as a four-piece – this was to be their last time playing together as Big Self (see footage below from this gig).  

Patmo and Bernard continued to play together in London for many years, in an alt.country band – Bernard now lives in the north west of Ireland where he plays in a jazz trio, while Patmo still gigs with bands in London. Jim and Michael no longer play music publically and are back living in Belfast, and the multi-talented Gordy has had a varied career after Big Self (and then Ruefrex), working as projectionist/manager at the cinema for some time before emigrating to Australia where he was a member of cult outfit Dave Graney and the Coral Snakes for many years, and now works as a web designer, as well as making music documentaries for the Australian Broadcasting Corporation.